Bach Quodlibet BWV 524

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What are those big castles swimming on the sea? and they’re looking bigger and bigger as they come closer? Friend or foe? Or how should I take this? But what do I see off in the distance? Tell me, who is riding into town? He’s carrying a big wheel on his back. This must be a sign that the executioner has died. He’s rides that horse rather stupidly and he’s wearing a coat of mourning as well.

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The faster earthly impressions pale due to their invalidity and futility/vanity, the more urgently we will need to flee from them.

 

Allegro

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Whoever wants to do some shipping in India will find that I have a lot of ships here. I am certainly not simply a shipping lout. (I do understand shipping quite well) I don’t need masts or sails, the way they do on the Texel, for a baking trough will do just as well. Take note, you gnarly individual you, what is the master tailor up to now?

He’s sewing patches on my pants, and repairing my clothes. If you need to use a baking trough as a row boat oh, then you will arrive in a terrible state, because you will fall into the pond, the pond which is so cold and you will keep swimming in it, and continue swimming on in it, like a dried cod, this is a proven fact.

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O you thoughts, why are you torturing my spirit so? Why do you want to waver since Hope is telling me to remain steadfast?

O, just look at the sour expression on Salome’s face That’s all because the groom is tickling her with the pitch fork. O, just look at how the house servants are eating up so much cheese and butter! If they were calves just like you, they would eat this fodder.

If you sit on a white horse with a spinning wheel almost all the country hicks would open wide their gaping mouth. If you sit on a large fox with a spinning wheel, people would practically die of laughter as they sobbed so much; If you sit on a large black horse with a spinning wheel, O, in this situation the mourning coat won’t even be suitable, fitting or proper attire.

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If you want to use the baking trough as a boat instead of a man-of-war, well, then you will soon be submerged in the water just the same way that the clumsy pike dive into the water.

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A large wedding means great joy; large swords require large sheaths; great judges need to have strong bailiffs; large dogs require large sticks; tall fathers have tall sons, big mouths have big teeth; large arrows need large quivers; large noses have large nostrils; great noble gentlemen have large coats of arms; large barrels have large taps; large-sized barley consists of large kernels; big heads have big horns; large-sized oats means large weeds growing in the crop; large horses means the presence of large wasps; a large vineyard yields large grapes; large ponds mean large hoods; large metal balls are large bowling balls; farmers who own a lot of land are lazy louts of the worst type; large unmarried women require large wreaths on their heads; large asses have large tails; a lot of loud laughter means being drenched to the skin from the tears created from laughing; tall women mean a lot of gossip; large clappers are needed for large drums; large wasps mean the presence also of large bumblebees; a large canvas needs a large area for bleaching; and large baking vats require large ponds to sink in.

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Oh, how I have been greatly deceived by that very clever Professor Cyprian!

         

Dearest Ursula, light a candle for me so that I can see what I am doing! If you don’t want to light it for me, I’ll certainly find you in the dark. If you think a woman is bad, a baking trough is really much worse.

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Pantagruel was a very funny man, and many a courtly servant is a devil in disguise; and if you scraped away the outer surface of a gold coin, there would be a lot of naked penniless people living in many a royal palace. If their ducats were of the same value as the large coins, then our neighbour’s wealth would be in the millions.

My back is still quite strong, I really can not complain about my situation.

 

You could probably carry, I would think, at least 20 sacks.

That must be a stupid ass who would rather drink thin beer than wine and sweat it out in a cold room and be sitting in a baking trough rather than in a ship.

Period. That’s final!

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Johannes is being asked to appear before the superintendent at 2 o’clock this afternoon on account of the matter of the waitress at the Golden Crown Tavern.

Students are generally very happy-go-lucky, as you all know, as long as they still have a red cent left in their wallet/purse.

If the gallows were a magnet and the tailor were made of iron, how many of them would make the trip to the gallows even today yet!

If I were the King of Portugal, why would I care about this? Let someone else sitting in the baking trough tip over into the brook.

Hello, hello, Mr. furrier, don’t you have any foxes any more? I am selling all of them at the court, highly honoured Sir. I saw a young, unmarried woman who acted very proudly, but she did not even wear a full shirt down town!

Some people pretend to be very friendly with finely phrase words, and yet at the same time they think/feel in their hearts: “you know what you can do for all I care.”

 

This year we will have 2 eclipses of the sun, and in the Breslau Rathskeller they serve a very good heavy and fattening beer, and in my wallet/purse there is a cancer which is eating up all my money.

Listen, gentlemen, all of you, to the news of what has happened in Austria,

Listen, gentlemen, to all the things that have happened in the Brabant region,

That’s where an old woman gave birth to a young sow!

All of you are now cordially invited to eat some pot roast now!

Oh, what a nice fugue this is!

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Translation © Thomas Braatz